A mountainous wishlist

I so wish I could have these right here, right now

A landcruiser
20 days
A pair of north face
Bose noise canceling headphones on my I pod
No company

A girl needs a road trip. Alone. It's the only way to discover what you really want. And how hard you can kick when you're faced with a situation, and how much you can go without worry, and how much you can survive on limited resources.

When I have company, it's distraction, it's help. Two things i need to learn to live without.

I need the Himalayas.
Like a thirsty desert nomad needs water.

From where I stand right now, I am that nomad.

I 'want' what I 'need'. That's the 1st most important crossroad in life.

all in a brownie day's work

To me, a brownie day is a day when you've done what you wanted to,rather than what you're supposed to, and there's no guilt about it.

pleasure is my addiction. what gives me that pleasure changes. everyday..AND probably every moment. that way i'm addicted. and quite mysteriously, NOT addicted either.

too much food is really good once in a way.

being mushy is not idiotic. it's therapeutic.

today i learned two new things from two interesting sources:

"Mellow is the man
who knows what he's been missing
many, many men
cant see the open road"

"together we stand, divided we fall"

health is infact, everything.

there's never too less time to grab aside to dream. or nap

valley of thoughts. useful, useless, beautiful, good, bad, scary and dreamy. i'd like a hand while i fall in it.

now is great, tomorrow will have a chance to become now, let's wait for it patiently.

who's my soul twin ? i'd like to know.

all in a brownie day's work

tea talk

pretty wired up i feel.

there are many people, who have come along in these 22 years

who have shown me who i am, what i'm capable of, who have changed my life for better, not for worse.

some i've grown up with, some i've disagreed with, some i've loved.. some great people and some, incompetent people.

stability is pretty much a dream. there is nothing such as stability since everything, i believe, is volatile. our thoughts, our actions and our desires.

this year, things have changed tremendously.

my closest friend and sister has found, in a friend, the man worth committing to, for a lifetime.

parents are preparing to see that little girl grow up and be in the shoes that they were in, 26 years ago.

i'm in my final move of completing the first step towards my dream.

one of my best friends and mentor, is changing job, experimentally. just like a kid. just because he fancies it.

my few close, precious people are branching out into different futures.

i've found a soul sister.

i've found love.

change is changing me.

now.

birds of a feather flock together

by all means and laws and facts and rhymes and riddles and words,
explain to me what 'originality' is.

what is originality and creativity if we cannot see them the way they have to be seen ?
what is credit ?
why do we give people credit and why do we seek it ?

mostly, we all seek appreciation.
only, remove the word "mostly" so, you'll be left with the truth.
for that reason, credit exists.

i believe that the roots of originality lie in chance.
what would we be if we were all the same?
since it's the human mind/animal mind that seeks a variety in everything..just everything, right from colors to clothes to seasons to places to mates, what would we be without originality ? NOT human, definitely.

what makes originality, is accident.
creativity, is an accidental arrangement of what you have with you. originality is haphazard.
since you know and see the best example, i'll name our planet. what's 'organized' about nature ? she's random. she's wild.
you won't see the same landscape in two different places. no two pine trees are the same. even identical twins are different !
that's originality. just a planned and beautiful accident.

if it's really an accident and it is random, what credit need we, for what is created (by us?) in a freak accidental moment? for our originality isn't even original.
because, 'randomness' is a copied thought. we're like horses on race tracks. programmed to commit randomness. to randomly arrange things to get something that 'looks' different from the rest, is a copied thought. we are trained, right from the time we're born to know, that randomness will give us something that 'looks' new.
but that, is not originality.. that, is merely an illusion of originality.
seeking originality and pursuing it, by now, wouldn't feel like an awesome idea anymore, with all the hue and cry we make of it.
when we do not know what originality really means, there's no big idea behind chasing something you cannot understand. and for our perception of originality, credit ? i doubt there's a solid base to this.

it is indeed very easy, at such an elementary level of thinking, to say that giving up credit is no big thing, for credit means nothing. however, it isn't that easy to find a person satisfied in their own intention, seeking nothing from anybody else. no appreciation, no approval.
nevertheless, 'credit' is the most useless entity. it's as ridiculous as how badly we need it. in all honesty,i can't stop laughing at how badly i need the credit for things i do, though i know it's absolutely purposeless.

what we must possess for achievement is real ego.
whereas, what we do possess, is phantom ego.. what we put on display. and food for phantom ego, is credit.
behind that facade, there's fear.
anger is a part of phantom ego. it arises when we cannot digest a fact or when we cannot discard useless opinions, and it hits us at our insecurities. you cannot fight the truth, nor should we ideally have those insecurities to regard useless opinions as significant.
to be insecure, is not human. it's stupid. and to believe that it's human, is even more stupid. because, somebody's told you that too, right ? why blindly believe in something that's not original ?
why should satisfying others satisfy us ? why should we look unto another's smile for approval ? another's nod, to be sure ? what's to be sure about, when you know what you want ?
there are no original thoughts, because we live in fear of defying.
things we do looking for everybody else's approval is not selfless, it's just being insecure in self. it dissolves the purpose of existing.
it doesn't make us. it kills 'us'

every step you take from now, think of how much of 'you' there is, in it

aarthi

happiness lies in ..l..

The solution i've realised, to unreasonable happenings and people, is only and only to let go.
After a lot of thinking and well, i must admit, wasting significant time and energy..i found an answer

the sensible ones will know your worth and win you. Or win you back.

there are 4 rules in testing times-
do not be answerable to anyone who doesn't deserve your answerability
stop whining
smile
dress like a charm

life ROCKS that way
-A

taped shut.

My parents brought me up telling me stories about unnecessary rules and going by them, living on them..examining them piece by piece, and following them..there are people who believe in that kind of life.
yes, they've told me it's all rubbish.

it is.

i've heard that and laughed about it, a million times, hardly knowing how it affects each one of us.
as i'm growing up, i can see it everywhere.

the line between code of conduct/code of living and redtapism is anything but THIN.
imagine a law for inhaling. for walking. for eating. that's what the world seems to boil down to, at times !
there's paperwork for the most miniscule of things, a certain way you HAVE TO behave. a certain way you're cut and moulded against all your steadfast protests. a method you must conform to, and pledge to stand by !
and then you become a part of this sordid system. get into it, and grill the rest of the world, with the flow.
most of us don't mind it, though we hate it. and THAT is the attitude that nurtures something as dirty as unnecessary bureaucracy.
well, some of us manage to escape unharmed by that kind of living. Yet at the end of one decade, we can count these "some of us" with just our 10 fingers

Darling, sometimes rules are necessary. so we all don't go mad. so we don't lose track of progress. so that justice lasts.
But that's it.

somewhere along the way, rules lost their very purpose.
there are purposeless purposes.. unreasonable reasons
and anything important, ALWAYS involves redtapism. (my post-intern seniors know it best, right now)
redtapism was born with ego of foolish people who cannot take advantage of anything other than power or position to advance to superiority. Oh no.

sure there are a lot of people around here who are experiencing deja vous..

i'm not going ahead and asking why there are so many red tapes around here, the reason is clear.
modern feudalism at its pinnacle..hah !

it's actually a pretty good world that's making me want to go on, every minute.

i'm learning. So much !

41° 39' 50" North / 83° 33' 19" West

her longing was his..
his wish, hers
he is the earth, and she is the sky
they're both infinite..
they were as far as up and down
but they met over the horizon

like a dew drop on a cold morning grass
as unique and separate as the dew drop and the leaf
and as together as anything could be
that's how they are.

in that space between them,
love emerged.

they're one.

the ONLY ones with the sixth sense ?

so...what's that sixth sense we have that none other than our species has ?
do we even have a sixth sense ?
or is that just a feel-good term to prove our utmost superiority to ourselves as a species ? in that very purpose of proving, we've failed. no one other than our own species gives a damn about who has a sixth sense or who is superior. if you were to tell an animal about it, it wouldn't even understand. not because it's so stupid. but because, that sense and you are so insignificant that it doesn't even matter. try telling a tiger, face to face.."i've a sixth sense, i've a sixth sense"
ha-ha.. you won't even be alive to see the next minute anyway. then you didn't even have COMMON sense.

many great men, in their times, have described the sixth sense as a 'special' sense...maybe an instinct !? no !
other animals have the same instincts as we do.
intellect ? what rubbish. intellect is detrimental. it's the shovel to our own graves.
could it be 'that' thing ? oh wait..WHAT thing?
i've heard from so many people that it could be a sense of humor !
so...animals don't have a sense of humor, huh?
i'm sure all the nature-lovers disagree. 1000 percent.

of course animals have a humor ! probably better than ours..and more animated.
how do cubs, kittens, and puppies play? how do dogs play ?.. if they dont have a sense of humor
have you seen puppies chase you the moment you take a quick step ahead and run? and then halt with playful, expecting eyes the moment you stop..
cubs and kittens run right behind colored objects (that scientifically proved 'black&white' vision theory for animals...i still have my own doubts. nature's not so stupid to make them totally colorblind after making them so vibrant and colorful....it's like giving us sweets and surgically removing our taste buds ! science is in its infancy anyway..i don't know what it can prove.)

anyway, that's how erratic the mind is. it jumps from one place to another.
back to the 'sense of humor', i've a sparrow with his nest at my living-room window. this guy whistles back at me when i whistle at him. he holds this rope at the window and slides down with one leg..worth watching atleast once in a lifetime. if that's not humor, nothing in the world is.
birds have a sense of humor..they have their share of fun. all the time. they don't wear watches, they don't believe in deadlines. they live. live for the moment. and sing for the moment. maybe that's the basis to a really good 'sense' of humor. not just about performing funny standups for people..animals don't care about all that. and watching these comedy shows on tv !!! they just show us how shockingly large the scarcity of happiness in our lives is.

as kids, we did stupid things and laughed at stupid things. anything and everything humored us. the reason is...that we were not stupid. we were simply uninhibited. we laughed when we wanted to laugh and did what we thought made us happy. now as we grow up, these rules. and curbing. and oh, the absolute fright of being called a kid !
when we don't 'live', we don't laugh.
and to think we're busy spending our leisure time staring at inanimate bmw's outside car showrooms. even worse, on computer monitors.
if you're really missing some nature in your life, now's the time to reassess it..it'll show you what a sense of humor REALLY is.
i'll get back to where i began

6th sense ? what is that ?

we became.

define 'define'.
define 'wannabe'.

choose between wannabe and cool

it's wannabe to wanna be cool
is it cool to wannabe? haha.. surprisingly, yes.

we love to teach....we love to preach..





....it's as beautiful to learn :-)





"you learn something everyday if you pay attention"
Ray LeBlond

hypnotism

i'm so impulsive now..it's almost like i've been suggested to say these things after listening to their music

nusrat fateh ali khan..
what did you do to be able to sing a song like mann ki lagan so beautifully

kailash kher...simple enough to take your breath away
jagjit singh..
flute ramani..bombay jayashree..
i don't think god could bless anyone more

floyd and mark knopfler are sitting around, smiling. come back.

doctor's day ? yes..

doctors.
well...in the making, but eventually doctors, right ?
we had our day off. after attending the regulars..posting, lectures
there was bandra worli sealink..toll-free drive through 30 mins of cars and traffic
a bunch of carefree people, flavor of the month (remaining-of-the-month) gelatos, rainy weather and donuts. wholesome day, nice company, and empty pockets

rarely, empty pockets feel nice. like when the day has been worth spending on :)

mi carino
are you really busy ?
or is all this just naatak
nevertheless, wish me

Random rubbish

too many things.

first of all, i'm busy. but that doesn't mean i dont do the things that i like doing most - talking to close friends, hunting down the sale shops, and spending time on the net.
if there'd be 5 things i can't live without, i'd say thats too less, make it 10 things. internet would be no.2
internet for...mail access- number one priority. visiting some new crazy website everyday, learning more things. ivillage-hotspot for all bored women.
chatting (which, thanks to some mahaan vip's isn't happening as often) and sudarshan's blog is far from updated. it's downdated actually..internet fossil material you may call it..so the only brainstorming i enjoy reading is also fast asleep
my blog. only thing left

a few days back someone was telling me that the current govnment has lowest ever inflation in history. i told him, use your brain, grandpa..so what ? what just happened 3 days back to the prices ? french beans have never costed 68 bucks a kg. all these years.
food inflation. human deflation. how inverse !
If you want to know about country economics, dont watch news channels or read big papers. ask vegetable vendors and housewives, they'll give you master education. Probably have a graph running too. They deal with the first indicators of a dire economic state..food prices.

On to the other things..
It's rained heavy today. which is why I'm so hyper. Which means, fun.
Beautiful calming day and a welcome break from the heat.
I just hope mumbai is geared up better than 26/7

More photography this monsoon. More raindrops, more flowers and leaves, more fresh greens, more nonsense and narcissism.




dinner time

21

If they say sweet 16, I wonder what they say about 21.
For there isn't a better age to arrive at !
It's the beginning of a new subset of life. Responsibility...oh u can be a child if you wanna :) no one's ever gonna stop u. Don't rush into responsibility...it's enough if u have it in mind. No one wants it on paper. For another two or three years at least.

Save all the undue paranoia a lot of people go through.
21 is beautiful.
Young. Stunning.